2 weeks of Hell
by anayalovedisney
Summary: TRIGGER WARNING: What happens when Katniss and Peeta get into their very first fight? I am not Suzanne Collins.
1. The Fight

Peeta and I got into our very first fight last night and it wad a bad one. Honestly I don't remember what even happened that set us off, but he slept downstairs and I "slept" in my room. I don't sleep well without him. We don't officially live together, but It's pretty much like we do I guess.

I get up and go take a look in the mirror at the damage that sleep deprivation has done. My eyes are puffy and bloodshot from crying andack of sleep. My hair is a tangled mess and ny cheeks are flushed. I try and do something with my hair the best I could. And for my face? There's nothing I can do but splash water on my face.

I head downstairs nervously and see Peeta sitting on the couch. I smell pancakes and he put some strawberries on the side.

I gasp at the sudden reminder. Madge.

He looks up at me and I make my way over to where my plate is.

"how'd you sleep" he asks softly.

"I didn't." I say coldly putting more concentration on the food in front of me.

"Oh." He sounded almost hurt. "Well I'm leaving."

I look up from my plate.

"T-to go where?" My stuttering made my cheeks burn.

"I dunno, probably to visit Finnick or Annie..or something. Just away from here."

"oh." I whisper returning my gaze to my now empty plate.

"I just..I just think we need some distance..you were right. Maybe I should "get the hell away from here on a train somewhere" "

Did I really say that? Oh my..

"I-I didn't mean it..I-I'm-"

"No need to apologize. I understand. Anyway I just came to say goodbye and I'm not sure when i'll be back."

"W-what? How could you do this to me!" I scream. "You can't leave me like this!" I begin sobbing. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean any of it! I was just mad!"

"Katniss.." he tries to reach for me then stops. "Goodbye."

And just like that, he walks out the door.


	2. Kicking and Screaming

I fall to the ground screaming and sobbing until my throat goes raw. I've probably woke up Haymitch, but I don't stop there. I begin throwing things and even breaking them. I lock all my doors so no one can even think of coming in and stopping me.

Once I finally calm down a bit, I call Haymitch. I tell him I'm going to four with Peeta and he's free of his babysitting duties. Luckily he bought it.

I honestly don't feel like eating. Ever. At this point. So I throw away everything. All of the food except water. When I run across Peeta's baking supplies it sends tears spiraling down my face. Once everything is thrown away, I remind myself that I won't have to see it again since i have no reason to be in the kitchen.

I contemplate flushing down all my medicene, so i do. I dump it all down the toilet and flush it.

i slouch against the bathroom wall and begin sobbing again. I cry for him, but I know he won't answer. He's gone.

I finally get the strength to get up and i realize It's dark out. I'm not ready to brave the night alone, but i have too. I crawl into bed and the emptiness beside me sends me into hysterics again. I eventually cry myself to sleep.

DAY FOUR:

I have no idea how long It's been or how many days have gone by. I drag myself out of bed and take a deep breath. It's like a chore to even breathe. I feel absolutely numb like I'm in some kind of void of despair. I don't know how much longer of this I can take..

I know i need a shower. So i go run one. I grab my razor so I can keep one of my many promises to Cinna. I always save shaving for last since It's my least favorite part, so I set myself down on one of the seats in the shower. I guess I wasn't paying attention, but I leave a long cut on my thigh. It's the first thing I've actually felt in a long time. So I do it again. And again. And again. My entire right leg is covered in blood. I'm not sure what to do with it, so I wash it off and get out of the shower.

I realize this has to be my own little secret. No one can ever know. It's my own glorious secret that I'll never share.

I have no idea of what to do with myself for the rest of the day. I sit on the couch and stare at the wall or twidle my thumbs. The numbness still envelopes me. So I go and turn the heat off. Maybe the cold will help me feel something cause after all it is December.

Eventually I get bored so I go and grab my razor. I prop myself on the couch and begin cutting on the exact same spots as earlier. It doesn't give me as much satisfaction the second time, so i move to my left leg. I don't know how long I sit there but eventually I will myself to stop.

I don't have the courage to face the empty bed again and I have no more tears to cry so it hurts even more. I remain on the couch and fall asleep there, but we all know not for long. For the nightmares are even worst for the weak.

DAY 6:

I haven't spoken, taken medicene or eaten in nearly a week. I've moved on to cutting my arms too since I've run out of space. It's beyond cold in here, but at least it helps me feel something. I go and get some water so I can replinish my tears.

I cry for him again until I'm weak. When will he come home? I pass out from all of the crying and i think lack of food. I don't recall waking up the next day either.


	3. A Call

DAY 9:

I have completely lost track of time. I'm not sure when was the last time I heard or seen Peeta. It feels like time is just frozen, but I'm pretty sure it keeps moving. The only difference I notice in myself is that I'm covered in even more scars than I remember having and my ribs are becoming noticable again.

One thing that shocks me back to life is the ring of the phone. I walk over too it and the caller id says "ODAIR". I pick up the phone and set it to my ear. My heart and head are pounding and i feel like I'm going to pass out.

"Katniss?" Says a voice that's not Peeta's. Must be Finnick.

I just sit there breathing in the phone for I have forgotten how to form words.

I hear Finnick say something like "she's here but she's not saying anything". Then I hear him.

"Katniss?" He says with a hint of urgency.

His voice breaks me and I make the most heart breaking noise you ever did hear and it sends me into violent sobs. Once i realized I hadn't hung up the phone I slam it on the reciever.

When I finally collect myself I go into the kitchen and grab a knife. I deepen my cuts. It makes me feel better that I'm finally able to control something for the first time in my life.

I pass out soon after.

DAY 13:

That's what my days consist of; crying, screaming, and cutting. I don't eat and after I cut I pass out. I'm convinced I'm going to die like this and one day not wake up after passing out. I don't think he's coming back now. And after that call? He's probably never coming back.

DAY 14:

It's nearly night time when i finally start cutting. It's unusual to wait so long but I guess i forgot. I start with my legs like normal and move to my arms and wrists.

I hear a noise of what sounds like someone is trying to break in.

I freeze.

Then i hear him.

"Katniss?" He says quietly.

It looks like no one has been here for weeks because the only light I ever leave on is my night light and the heat has been off.

"Katniss?" He says louder with more urgency.

I feel like crying but I can't, so I cut deeper into my left wrist.

I hear him drop whatever he's carrying and run up the stairs. He's screaming my name with so much worry it scares me. I just keep cutting. He won't find me. I'm in one of the bathrooms that we never use. Good thing the lights are off.

I hear him stumbling into rooms, throwing open doors until he comes into the bathroom I'm in. He flips the light switch and his eyes meet mine.

The sight he sees must have scared him because he went so pale you would have thought he was a ghost.

"Katniss!" He yells grabbing me into his arms causing me to drop my knife.

When the realization that I'm in his arms once again hits me I bury my face into his chest and cry.

"Sweetie are you okay? What have you done to yourself!"

I just shake my head and continue to cry. He sits against the wall where I once was and let's me cry in his arms.

"I'm here now. Shh don't cry, I'm here" he says rubbing my back and rocking me.

When my crying turns into sniffles he grabs my left arm and exams it.

"What happened?" He said softly.

"I-I cut myself." I whispered.

He looks at me with terrified eyes and looks at my other arm. "Did you do this anywhere else?" He asks.

I show him my legs and he makes that sound like he's about to cry. He hugs me so tight against him and I feel a few tears on my head.

"I didn't mean to hurt you so bad.." he says with despair.

I shake my head and I get dizzy and fall limp in his arms.

"Katniss..When was the last time you ate?"

I shrug my shoulders and say faintly, "when was the last time I saw you?"

His eyes get wide and before I know it, he's running into my room. He lays me on the bed. If I had any energy left I would've held onto him. He comes back with a wash cloth and some gauze. He washes my cuts and I wince at the pain.

He kisses my cheek at any sign of pain and says, "shh it'll be over soon" or "that's my girl"

He finally bandages them. Then goes to work on my clothes. He grabs one of his shirts, because he knows I like to sleep in them. Don't ask me why but a lot of his clothes are at my house.

Normally I wouldn't have let him undress me like this, but since I'm physically incapable I just close my eyes. He slips on one of his shirts on me first and takes the other things off under it carefully. He really does respect me.

"Kat, why is it soo cold?" he says rubbing his arms.

I don't feel like giving him an answer so I just lay back and close my eyes.

"No, no Kitty you have to stay awake with me okay?" He says caressing my face.

He's right. I'd probably pass out for a good 12 hours if he would let me drift off like that.

He leaves me briefly to turn the heat back on. When he returns, he tucks me in bed and kisses me on the cheek. He turns off all the lights except one and turns to leave.

I reach for him and he chuckles. "Where'd you think I was going sweetheart?"

I hide my face embarrassed and he slides in bed next to me.

I turn to face him and he rubs his thumb down the length of my face.

"Why did you leave me?" I finally choke out.

He just looks at me for a while before he says this, "Because. I thought that's what you wanted and I was sort of mad and in the moment. I thought you'd be okay, but I wasn't. I was a wreck at Finnick's. That's why I wanted Finnick to call you and see if you were okay."

"D-Did you hear me?" I start to shake.

"Unfortunately. It made my heart shatter and even worst I just listened to you cry thinking "what the hell did I just do?" "

"Oh." I say before he pulls me into his chest.

I inhale his scent. God have I miss him.

"Tell me everything Kat. Everything, no matter how bad it is."

I pull back some. "I-I don't know if I can do that.."

He pulls back some more so he can look me in the eyes with his piercing blue ones.

"Please." he pleads.

I look down before telling him everything.

**A/N: What do you guys think so far? It's so sad I know, but I'm not sure if I add just one more chapter or keep this going, or start a new fanfic? we'll see c:**


	4. Author's Note

A/N: I'm gunna delete this story because apparently it has become a huge problem. I wanted to try writing from a different angle than a lot of the happy stuff I write, but I guess that didn't work out to well. Sorry for the inconvenience. There's also typos because I didn't have a computer for 3 months and I wrote all of these on my phone using google docs then uploading from there. So I do apologize. Thanks for understanding.


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